As a now adult psychic child, I get a lot of requests from readers on the blog about what is the best thing that can be done or said to support a budding psychic child. And while I had parents that were supportive, not everyone in my family understood or tried to understand what exactly I was experiencing or seeing. In fact, no one really did, except my life-saver twin sister, Sarah.
And it wasn’t a result of neglect or maliciousness, it was simply a matter of family heritage. While my abilities were understood and acknowledged (I was never told what I experienced wasn’t real or that I was making it up), the topic was, by and large, strongly avoided. No one wanted to talk about it and no one wanted it to be talked about.
In an effort to understand my own abilities, then, I spent a lot of time at the public library, watching television shows and speculating. From my kid-research, I came up with a few conclusions.
Ghosts are scary.
I’m definitely being haunted.
There’s nothing I can do to make it stop.
As an artifact of television, books and online articles (excluding my now-blog, of course!) being more problem oriented than solution oriented, I was able to find plenty of information about what horrible Spirits may be doing and around me (they’re mostly not horrible, by the way), and essentially zero information on what I could do to understand or manage it.
So, I kind of grew up with all the ‘wrong’ kind of knowledge on the Spiritual world and my abilities. I grew up being afraid.
Unfortunately, most of my clients who reach out for help feel the same way. With the cultural mindset of ‘spirits are spooks’, many of my clients don’t even know they want their abilities, but they know one thing for sure: something has to be done or they might lose their minds.
Without further ado, here’s my list of what I know now and what I wish someone would have told me about working with the Spirit World approximately 25 years ago:
The Top 5 Messages for a Young Psychic or Medium
1. You can tell them to leave
Since the rule in my family was to never talk about ‘it’ (where ‘it’ was whole encompassing of all things psychic or paranormal) I never really got any advice besides, “try to ignore it”.
And, ignoring a Spirit is like ignoring a regular human person standing right behind you or someone staring at you from across the room - it doesn’t get the behavior to stop or change, and it’s still really uncomfortable (not to mention highly unsettling).
Just as you could tell someone to stop staring at you or stop standing behind you, you can tell a Spirit to do the same and it’s so easy. There’s no tricks or tools and they’ll hear you loud and clear. Because the world of Spirit is right along side the world of Humans, it’s like talking to someone across a room - they hear you. And even though the whole hearing them talk back is challenging (deceased people don’t have voice boxes), it’s possible to learn and develop your ability hear those in Spirit, too.
But if you want to be left alone, all you have to do is say stop. And if you want to find out who exactly is visiting you, all you have to do is ask. Ignoring a Spirit just creates a mystery where there wasn’t one before. And you can solve it by speaking up. Learn how here or here.
2. They’re just people
Not a Demon. Not a Poltergeist. Not a Monster. Not a Hellspawn.
For the most part, the Spirits that visit children and teens (and regular adults for that matter) are in these three categories:
Deceased Loved Ones - dead people who know you or someone you know
Spirit Guides - individuals who were once people that have been assigned to watch over you
Guardian Angels - individuals who protect and guide you personally
And of course, there are sometimes lonely human spirits passing through and other children in Spirit who are looking for friends and companionship. For the most part, those in Spirit don’t visit you because they mean to be weird, rather, they visit because it’s fun to have a friend. And, you can see, hear and feel them. It’s always better to be friends with someone who notices you, isn’t it?
If you are feeling afraid, the best thing you can do for your peace of mind is to remind yourself this: It’s just a person. Like you. Like me.
3. They’re not going to hurt you
Sure, there are those in Spirit who can scratch, tap, push or pull you in a variety of ways. These Spirits are bullies. And on Earth, bullies are, thankfully, very few and far between. Generally, people are nice and don’t hurt other people. It’s the same for the Spirit world. Bullies are rare all the way around. But, if you feel you’ve run into a Spiritual bully, learn how to deal with them here.
But chances are, you haven’t. This is pretty rare, even though television would have you believe otherwise. It’s just not sensational to have a show all about compassionate Spirits who keep you safe and care about your well being. Their deeds generally go unnoticed. Good Samaritans rarely make the news.
4. You aren’t alone
I have a very popular article on the blog called 21 signs you’re a medium. Each month, on a regular non-viral month, it averages around 2,000 views. This means there are at least half that many people who actually are and do have similar experiences to yours. In addition, in the book, Hello! From Heaven, Bill and Judy Guggenheim catalog over 2,000 personal experiences from regular people who have received contact from the Other Side. To top that, every culture on Earth has beliefs that there is some sort of eternal life for the Human Spirit after death.
And to put a cherry on top of all that, you at least have me - a regular person with similar experiences in learning, full with trial and lots of error. Except now, I’m teaching you from my catalog of hardships and successes - on how to deal Spirit and develop your gifts safely.
5. People will love you anyway
When I was younger, myself and my siblings were not supposed to talk about Spirits, dreams or anything psychic. And because I experienced some of the most intense Spiritual activity of my siblings, this rule was pointed directly at me. In addition to teaching me what was socially acceptable, this rule taught me something even bigger:
It’s not okay to be you. Or share with other people what you feel and experience.
So, this is a pretty isolating lesson. And, as I grew up, I tried everything I could to not be a medium and ignore my abilities. I kept the true strength of what I saw and heard pretty much a secret from everyone I knew - family members, romantic partners and most definitely - employers and coworkers. Over time, creating a rule within myself that if people knew, they wouldn’t accept it. And, they wouldn’t accept me.
And fortunately, that’s a complete lie. Connecting with the world of Spirit is a beautiful ability. Once accepted and embraced, it’s a beautiful golden paint brush that can enhance your entire life. It can also enhance the life of those around you.
When I came out of the psychic closet, as it turned out, people loved me anyways. Friends, family and coworkers, mostly stayed my friends, family and coworkers. And those that didn’t? Well, now I know who my true friends really are.
Thinking of embracing your abilities? There are a lot of places to start, but why not learn more about my personal experiences in developing and accepting my own gifts into my life? I invite you to read on here.
Enjoy the Journey!