My mom went to her first medium before I was a professional medium, and my deceased father came through. He appeared to the medium as a gaunt, sickly and skinny man - not all that healthy looking. She then described him to my mother, who was able to identify him based on this description.
Without a physical body, the deceased can choose how they look and appear to certain people.
Sometimes the deceased will come to readings and appear 10-15 years younger than they were when they passed. They might appear taller, leaner or with fuller hair and curves than when they were actually living. In some cases, the deceased will show up in a session, looking very distinctly from a period of their life that they really enjoyed. They can choose to portray themselves with the personality they only *wish* they had when they were alive.
The deceased can choose:
To portray themselves how you will best remember them
Or to portray themselves the way they think they'll be remembered
Identifying a Spirit by appearance only in a session can be either very easy (when your loved ones go with option 1) or very hard (when they choose option 2).
Your loved ones can choose the most ideal version of themselves, including both appearance AND personality.
Wouldn’t it be great if we got to chose how people remembered us?
I remember my father as healthy and well, where as my mother, often remembers him as how he looked right before he passed away - so that’s how he appeared to her, hoping to be identified the fastest.
It didn't work on that particular occasion, and as a Spirit who is still learning in the afterlife, he's come through as his younger vibrant self for my mother in following readings, and she's always got him right away.
In other words, he learned how to do better -
And hopefully, is saving the medium community tons of trouble by coming through in a way people remember him.
Amanda Linette Meder