When my father died, I was halfway across the country.
The span of time between hearing the news and his actual crossing was less than eight hours.
Because it was night time when we got the news, flights for the day, had largely departed. And because of our distance, no matter how fast I drove, without a time machine, no one - not even me - would make it.
So I didn’t have a chance to say a formal goodbye to my father. No one else I know, did either. It all just happened so fast.
But for a long time personally, I felt a lot of guilt about it and I wondered if my father knew how much I wished to be there, and how much I still missed him.
If you are reading this, you may be wondering, too.
Does my deceased loved one know that I really wanted to say goodbye? Are they mad at me that I couldn’t? Do they wish I would’ve had a chance to say goodbye to them before they died? Or wish that I tried harder to be there or do . . . something? Anything?
They already know.
They know how much you miss them and they already forgive you for not being able to say goodbye.
The truth is - they wanted a chance to say goodbye to you, too.
They wanted to finish telling you the stories they meant to tell you when you were older, when things settled down, once the kids were bigger, and once everything got a lot less hectic.
In life though, that rarely ever happens.
Thankfully, with the loss of their physical body, they are able to take certain liberties immediately after becoming Spirit, and before fully crossing over to do the goodbying for everyone.
Of course, one of the last things your person did before leaving Earth was to say goodbye to everyone that they love.
And that includes you.
When a Spirit People comes through to me, and it’s someone who died suddenly or without all of their family members present, they hardly care at all, and usually they say something like this,
“Oh, don’t worry! Who cares anyway!
After I died, I stuck around for a few days. I’m still here now! Look! So I visited everyone to say goodbye until I was ready to leave, I even said goodbye to you . . . remember that time when . . . you noticed xyz and it was weird . . . Yep, that was me. ”
The weird phone call - them.
The hand print - them.
That rogue footstep - also them.
Take a moment, take a deep breath. Release your guilt. They know, and they forgive.
You just have to forgive yourself now.
Important matters like giving one last hug to their daughter, and one last kiss to their wife, these things are always taken care of.
Spirit Persons most commonly will visit in dream like states during the twilight hours, especially right after passing to make their goodbyes, but sometimes, the grief is too heavy to feel it or sense it. So, if that happens, sometimes they’ll visit someone else instead in an attempt to get the message through (so what I’m saying is: check in with friends and family and ask if anything weird has happened. Ask them to be candid. Now is the time for that).
Twilight is when people will see typically their loved one, right before waking or right before falling asleep. It’s hard to call it a dream, because it almost isn’t one. If this happens to you, and you wake up feeling awake and aware, and not afraid, this is hands-down, in most cases, what is known as a true visitation.
But they can also visit in other ways.
The possibilities, really, are quite endless.
Amanda Linette Meder