Psychic mediums have feelings. And they’re people, too.
Often because we’re in a field of service and of giving to others, our intentions are questioned and the reasons behind the way we give and why, is often put into conversation - without ever asking us.
This article is not just written for me, it’s written on behalf of all of the psychic mediums I have coached, ever worked with and even those that I know have these sentiments and have not yet stated them out loud.
Have a psychic medium? Know a psychic medium?
Here’s a chance to get to know us, a little bit better.
7 Things Your Psychic Medium is Tired of Hearing
1. “Can you donate a reading to my event, fundraiser, cause, party, etc?”
I love to support causes. In fact, I donate all the time to causes I believe in. I donate to Kickstarter campaigns, GoFundMe proposals and even to non-profits and dreams that I believe in, just for the sake of me believing in it and it being a great cause.
However, readings are more than what they seem.
While they offer others a connection with the Other Side, they are also a piece of me. A piece of my heart, my soul goes into each and every session I ever give. I’m not just facilitating a connection, I’m giving to each client, a piece of who I am as a soul. Time, energy and extreme amounts of care, attention, practice and effort go into each and every session and while I’ve given hundreds of readings to others for free (let me repeat that, *hundreds*), and I still will, it’s my experience that people only value something, when they trade that something, for something they value.
What I mean is, when I do a reading for free, I have tended to notice that the recipient of that message, generally cares way less about the effort, energy, intention and time that went into that reading, than a recipient of the message who saved their money, traded with me for a good or service from their own heart, or otherwise, exchanged something valuable from themselves for something valuable for myself.
It’s like painting a work of art, which takes you hours, days or weeks to paint and handing it to someone who just ‘shrugs’, walks away and could not care less. It doesn’t feel good.
So it’s not that I don’t support your campaign, or your cause (I’m happy to donate something else!), but when offering a piece of my soul to someone, I’d really, really like for the recipient to care about it’s value. And generally, when a reading is offered as a ‘free prize’, the value is not seen by that recipient - not in the same way it’s seen by a recipient who has been thinking, planning and intending on getting a reading for over 6 months to a year.
2. “If you really have a gift, and genuinely want to help people, why don’t you offer it for free?”
The work that I do is intangible, I get it, and it's primarily located in the spiritual world. In fact, most of my days, I spend communicating with Spirit and actually, it wasn’t always this way. I used to have a physical world job that helped me pay the physical world bills - until I started doing readings.
At first, when I started giving readings, I was giving two readings a night after spending 10-12 hours a day outside in a research plot, working on gathering data for my job. And I always just expected readings to be a ‘side thing’, something I could do, to help people on the side, and I didn’t want to charge - because why? Because it was a gift and I wanted to offer it freely.
However, over time, the email requests I got for readings and the email requests I got for help became to overwhelming that I was spending most of my time replying and helping others - for free - and very little of my time doing things that actually kept a roof over my head.
When I first started my business, I lived in a fifth wheel RV trailer - for free. I was making no money, I had hardly any groceries or a reliable internet connection, meanwhile, giving free readings all day, every day. And then one day, I realized, Amanda, you cannot live in a free trailer in the woods forever without reliable groceries or a source of heat.
So, I had to begin charging, to pay for my physical world bills. To keep a roof over my head. To pay for groceries, gas and for the plumber that is supposed to come (even if he doesn’t show up).
I do genuinely care about helping others, but I also genuinely care about not being homeless. Without a home, without food and without a way to pay bills - I can’t offer help, guidance or readings to anyone at all - free or not.
And guess what? I still do genuinely offer my help for free. I spend the majority of my time now - not giving readings, but writing blogs and articles to help others develop their gifts - for free. Now, there’s even a free radio show in the mix - all to genuinely help you, to share my gifts for free.
So, if you support you medium, have found value in what they have offered to you, and you’ve read his or her books and enjoy their work - book a reading - it’s likely the only way they can pay their rent that month.
3. “What do you think about, can you look into, can you just tell me . . . ?”
Family and friends, I would be happy to offer you my human advice, guidance and support, but doing a reading on it is another story.
It’s not that easy to just pop into psychic mode all the time, on top of that, I need to turn it off sometimes, to not go crazy.
I need some down time, I need some time when I am ‘off-duty’, when no one is asking me to be psychic or to be something. Doing a reading on something, takes lots of energy and to save my resources for those who wish to exchange value for that time and energy, I have to turn down my abilities when I’m not on the clock. I can’t always be looking into things. I can’t always be your fountain of psychic guidance, whenever you want or need it.
And I know when you are passive aggressively asking for a free mini-reading. It’s obvious. So rather than beating around the bush - just ask me out-right - and I’ll be able to tell you if I have time to look into it today or if it might have to wait until next week, when things calm down in my life.
I’m not trying to withhold Divine information from you and be selfish with my gift, but on top of all that, I need your permission to do a reading on something. So without being asked directly, I can’t know that you need that support.
4. “Do you see anything/my guides/angels/loved ones around me/what’s my aura like?”
Wow, I’ve been bombarded with this one more times than I can count by strangers at weddings, friends of friends of friends at random barbecues and by people who have had too much to drink and have overheard (or heard via gossip) of what I do for a living.
If you’d like a reading, ask for a reading and then we can schedule one. Now please, let me enjoy my beer and have a nice afternoon, like everyone else at this backyard party.
5. “Can you bring through xx person for me? I want to talk to them instead.”
I don’t get to choose which Spirit wants to come through for you at what time or when. I can set up, prepare, invite them in, hope that the person you want to come, comes, but . . they choose. I don’t choose.
I am only the conduit, the mouth, for whoever is coming through at that time.
If that person you booked the reading for, isn’t at the reading for you, there’s nothing I can do about it, but ask that we listen to the message from the person (or persons) that did make the effort to come. There’s a reason this person is here to talk to you, anyway, even if it’s not who you expected. May as well hear them out. It’s usually worth your while.
6. “Do you see them everywhere you go? Like, when you walk down the street?”
I know you are interested in how it all works, but I'm not a circus animal or a freak of nature. Sometimes, when people ask me questions these, it makes me feel like there is something wrong with me - like I’m some sort of oddity or that I have a disease. Yes, I see them everywhere I go. Yes, when I walk down the street. No, not all mediums experience it the same way.
Thankfully, though, I can tone it down, ignore it and block it out - these are tools I’ve developed and I teach other mediums in sessions - so that the deceased are not constantly bombarding my life.
Tip: If you want to ask a medium about his or her abilities, start with a compliment or a genuine kindness of words BEFORE you start asking probing personal questions.
For example, “I’ve always been interested in mediumship and people who have the ability to hear/see Spirits and I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions about it - is that okay?”
7. “Your sessions cost a lot of money.”
A medium will rarely tell you this, but your session, lasts far longer than the time you are in the reading chair. Your loved ones come early, sometimes following us around for weeks, then use our bodies as a vessel to communicate with you directly. Afterwards, we feel drained, tired, exhausted and sometimes not good at all - mostly because of all the energy that was just zapped from us from doing a single session. If your reading costs $325, or even $800, the more the reading costs, the more work, personal side effects, time and energy generally goes into preparing for your session. And generally, but not always, the higher the price, the more practice, training and professional development that medium has spent on delivering to you a quality product.
While a session may look easy and effortless to you while we are doing it (Surprise! This is because that’s the way we want it to look), it’s not. It’s not always as quick as just ‘looking into it’. It takes a lot of work to bring through a Spirit, clearly, concisely and accurately. There’s a huge difference between me sensing, seeing and hearing a Spirit and then taking that Spirit into my body so that they may communicate with you.
On top of that, the majority of mediums spend a great deal of their time offering free services, writing articles online, giving talks, hosting classes or radio shows or next to nothing in payment (sometimes, it costs them to put it on), all to help others develop and connect on their own, where the cost of the reading offsets all the services they offer in exchange for no-pay (see above).
If your medium has a high price for a reading, there’s a reason why - and it’s likely, he/she is delivering to you far more than you think.