As you read this, you might be sitting at your work desk, wondering why you have to experience such a negative environment. Perhaps a few of your co-workers are cranky, easy to anger, or just energy downers. Or perhaps you are dealing with someone who you may consider emotionally unreasonable or somehow, finds a way to spin a tale of sadness, anger, or judgement into every story.
While you may have read books on energy vampires - individuals who zap and draw on the energy of others and whom you feel energetically drained and exhausted when you are around them - it’s hard to simply avoid these individuals if they exist in a place where you frequent nearly every day.
We’ve all had people in our lives that for some reason or another - we couldn’t simply avoid, instead we must learn how to manage their emotions in a way that does not impact our own.
Here are a few ways to help you deal with a negative person in the home or workplace.
How to Release Negativity in Your Home or Workplace
understand Pain Energy
The best way to deal with negativity is through understanding and compassion. Understand that this person is likely dealing with something that I call ‘pain energy’. Pain energy is a type of emotional category, that generally has to do with unprocessed emotions from the past (whether in this current life or past).
In readings, pain energy appears to be a swirling, black cloud of smoke, sometimes trapped in the stomach, behind the heart, over the whole body, and occasionally surrounding the entire person. If the negative person you are dealing with shows a lot of anger or anxiety, their pain energy is generally bottled up and stored behind a wall. If the person you are dealing with feels down or grumpy all the time, their pain energy may just be externally swirling around them.
In most cases, how someone else feels, has nothing to do with you and is not a reflection of you. It’s a reflection of the painful emotions they are feeling. Understand that their “negativity” is pain, rather than a purposeful attempt to make you miserable - and suddenly, it seems a lot easier to deal with and understand!
Send Love and Compassion
The person who is being negative is likely dealing with some pain energy that needs to be healed. While it is not your responsibility to heal anyone of their issues and deep seated emotions, it’s always your responsibility to ask, “How can I be more compassionate in this situation?" In order to deflect negativity, instead of fueling the fire and sending more negativity - try send compassion to them. This could come in the form of a positive loving thought, a genuine prayer, or by visualizing them behind surrounded by a loving, cloud of pink energy.
The more love, even passively, that they receive from others, the more this person will be able to open up and to release some of the pain energy that is shielding them from. As more love is sent in their direction, the more opportunities this person have to be able to feel it - and begin the process of shedding their defense layers (which are made of pain and fear energy!).
See Any Emotion as a Gift - That You Can Accept or Reject
When someone shares their emotions with you or with the world, they are offering a gift of themselves. Any emotion that anyone is feeling is a piece of what they are experiencing, that they are choosing to share with you. Because of this, you have a choice. You can accept what they are sharing or you can reject it.
Often times, when someone displays or exhibits a lot ‘pain energy’, or negativity, I’ll simply observe it and say to myself, “Wow, this person is really releasing a lot of fears/pain/anger right now”.
Observe what this person is offering to you.
Is this a present you would like to accept?
As you observe their emotional display, visualize (or actually) take a step back. Imagine their emotional offering to you in a tiny gift box with a giant bow, and they are handing it to you. Are you going to reach out and take it? Accept it as something that belongs to you now?
If you don’t want their gift, simply imagine yourself pushing away their ‘gift box’ with both hands, and in your mind or out loud say, “No, thank you, I’m not interested in receiving this from you right now”.
Afterward, simply walk away, hang up the phone, or otherwise, end the interaction. However this person behaves after this - is none of your business!
Protective Bubble or Shield
Imagine yourself being surrounded by a bubble of light, of any color, but I like to choose purple.
When you visualize this, say, “Anything that is at my energetic vibration or above is welcome into this energy space, and everything else is sent back to the original owner.” A more detailed explanation on how to release negativity this way can be found here.
Cut the Cords
If the emotions and energy of this person really gets to you and affects your ability to focus, concentrate, or move forward - consider that you may have an energetic cord connecting you and this person, and it’s time to disconnect.
Often, energetic cords will form from thoughts and emotions exchanged between two people, and sometimes that connection stays in place and continues to affect you well after the interaction has ended. Have you ever ended a conversation, only to think about what was said and not said for hours or days after the topic? It's possible there's a cord from you to them, and their energy is still affecting you. By simply de-cording, many people feel better almost instantly.
For a how - to on cord cutting, check out The Membership Program, where I have several meditations, articles, and videos all dedicated to this topic.
So, next time you are faced with negativity in the workplace, home, at the store, or anywhere in your life, make sure the cords are cut between you and this person, put up a protective shield and imagine it as a gift - a gift that you can choose to not accept.